When you buy through the links on our site we may earn a commission. . They include some of the best Bill Clinton jokes, not to mention Monica Lewinsky jokes. The girl at the counter said, "That's impossible. On October 30 last year in Whitehorse, residents were disturbed by a spooky noise ringing throughout town. Joke #1 Ask the Army to secure a building and they will set up a perimeter around it and make sure nobody gets out. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. A poutine joke, a Toronto joke, or a Nova Scotia joke are all common among Canadian nice humor. Canadian: That's a moose! Two men applied, a Canadian man, and an American. What is the only place in the world where the United Kingdom and Latin America meet? !The Canadian Godfather:Im gonna make him an offer he will be free to refuse but I will urge him not to as it is very generous.Scientists are baffled by Canadians ability to watch movies and play video games and not shoot each other.I never want to try Canadian whiskey, because I dont want to get drunk & start being incredibly polite to people.There are few, if any, Canadian men that have never spelled their name in a snow bank. He got delayed because he was poutine in some food! You know you are from Canada when You drink pop, not soda. What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Titanic have in common? TIL the Titanic movie was released in 3D in 2012. he asks. Duck! Canada Jokes #9 - 1. There was an elderly couple who lived in a small house, right smack dab on the U.S. and Canadian border. Canadian: What's that about? It was because the thieves never get cod! The manager then responded, "Well, you both did equally well in the interview, but the real problem was the test. Not all French speakers are of French descent . 94. The American was outraged. by Stephen on January 16, 2013. 70. 4. When the Russian President Vladimir Putin visits Canada, he loves eating the poutine! With a Master of Arts in English, she has worked as a private tutor and, in the past few years, has moved into content writing for companies such as Writer's Zone. The Irishman headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the Foreman's door. 'Its Always Snowing in Winnipeg! When you are talking to your close friends, your family members or your doctor, all the topics are good. "Im having a baby." - she replies. I hate double standards. "Why is your stomach so big?" - he asks. 47. Canada Jokes #59 - 50. 88. The name of the place is Onta-Rio!What would be the favorite comedy show for Canadians?Its Always Snowing in Winnipeg!What is the name of the American TV show about a Canadian singer?The show is Leave it to Bieber!What are the two seasons predominantly seen in Canada?It is just winter and then July!What would the space program be called when the United States and Canadians collaborate?It would be called the Apollo-G!What is the name of the Canadian show that has young males visit the movie-themed parks?It is the Trailer Park Boys!What is the greatest irony regarding peaceful Canadians?They become violent when their hockey team loses.Why do Canadians get such a good supply of hard water?This is because most of the water is frozen!What is the type of tire that fixes itself on its own without troubling the driver?It is a Canadian tire.What is the best tourist advert for Canada?This is the land where frostbite and sunburn happen in the same week!What is the only place in the world where you can have English and French breakfasts together?You can have them together only in Canada.How does a Canadian confess his love for his crush?I love you even more than poutine!What is the name of the Canadian TV show that everyone loves to watch?The name of the show is The Cold & The Beautiful!What was the time on the clock when the Canadian Prime Minister ate the poutine?It was Eight P.M.!Why couldnt I reach my Canadian friend during an emergency?Because he was watching a game of hockey! ", We'll either have the first female president, the first Jewish president, the first Canadian president, or the last president., A large Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good Lumberjack. 30 Inappropriate Jokes That Will Make You Both Laugh and Cringe We promise you'll crack a smile; we can't promise you won't feel guilty about it. Though some leaders use humor instinctively, many more could wield it . Why are Canadian students so smart?They get a lot of ehs.What time was it when the monster gobbled up the Prime Minister?Eight P.M.What has antlers and sucks blood?A moose-quito.What does Canada produce that no other country in the world can?Canadians!How do you get a Canadian to apologize?Step on their foot.Why do Canadians have a hard water problem?Its frozen most of the year!How did the beaver get online?He logged on.What did the beaver say to the maple tree?Its been nice gnawing you!Why shouldnt hockey players tell jokes on the ice?Because it might crack up!What do Canadian ghosts eat for lunch?Boo-tine!Whats yellow, has red hair and freckles, and lives in PEI?Banana of Green Gables!Someone tried to sell me Canada.But I was having Nunavut.Why did the fugitives run to Canada?Because they had nowhere else Toronto.Where are there a lot of Bigfoot sightings?In Sasquatch Ewan!Why did the pirate move to Manitoba?He heard he could Winnipeg! What is the only place in the world where the United Kingdom and Latin America meet? What did the brilliant Canadian student get in his test? Why did the weightlifter move to Prince Edward Island? I was doing an overnight at a hotel away from home. 'Sure you'd be arrested for less!'". It might seem a bit weird, but tah-bar-nac (the box where the Eucharist is kept) is a common swear word uttered in a fit of agitation. because theyre great at icing. The Canadian says, "We already have too many of these in Canada!" Jim Carrey, Mike Meyers, John Candy, Lesley Nielsen, Dan Aykroyd, Samantha Bee, Mary Walsh, Timmy Chong, Rick Moranis .the list of internationally famous Canadian comedic talent is long. How do you get invited to get-togethers in Canada?Someone says, Hey, were having a part-eh!Why is Canada so good at social media platforms like Facebook?They have so many lakes.How do the Toronto Blue Jays get ready for a game?They do worm-up sessions.What did the excited tourist say on their first visit to Canada?Yukon see the northern lights from here!What song do pumped-up Canadians sing?Who Let the Sled Dogs Out?How does Canada respond to coin shortages in the U.S.?They give us Nickelback.How do Canadians take care of their hair?With moose.I went to watch a boxing match in CanadaAnd a hockey game broke out!My brother didnt believe me when I told him the name of Canadas prime minister.I replied, You may not believe me, but its Trudeau!Why didnt the tourist want to visit the lake from the Canadian side of the border?It was giving them an eerie feeling.What do people say about Canada in the winter?Its the moose beautiful time of the year.I asked my tour guide to tell a funny joke about CanadaHe responded, Im sorry, but I Canada think of any.Why didnt the American make a joke about the Canadian border?They realized that would cross a line.What do you call a special type of deer in Canada that drinks human blood?The moose-quito.I finally decided to open a business in Canada.My business advisors told me, Dont get cod feet!Why was the tourist terrified during their trip to Canada?There was so much tundra and lightning! I visited my Canadian friend in winter and greeted him by saying, "It is ice to meet you, buddy!". Get ready to laugh out loud with Canada's best jokes! It also includes a number of sexual jokes and scenes. 26. Manage Settings A rip off. Sadly, Nunavit! So, dont say a-boot unless you want to get kicked by one. Outside work, her interests include music, movies, travel, philanthropy, writing her blog, and reading. What do all the people in the Capital of Canada eat for their breakfast? A Canadian went into a Tom Horton's and noticed there was a "Roll Up The Rim To Win" Contest. The Scotsman, having never seen one before, is astounded. said the Foreman. But to understand funny Canada jokes, you must have a great sense of humor! This category is all about the clever Canadian jokes. A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. Here's how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you. 89. Well, dear, that's an unarmed citizen with health insurance. We try our very best, but cannot guarantee perfection. Christmas jokes - Another set of hilarious jokes to print. 80. Time for your nap!Knock knock.Whos there?Whoo.Whoo-hoo.Thank you! 25. These are Canadas most unique restaurants. When the Canadian went for his blood test, the results came out as Eh positive! I lost my job as a zookeeper. Canadian French: Canadian French (French: franais canadien) is the French language as it is spoken in Canada. By Bob Larkin October 1, 2020 Shutterstock/Krakenimages.com It's been said that analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. He says out loud, "One plus six, that son of a bitch is seven. A faux-pair. How does a Canadian confess his love for his crush? Nissan - Made in Japan! Be careful before you utter a disparaging remark about a hockey player or team in Canadaa seemingly innocent comment can quickly turn into one of the most offensive Canadian insults. 69. There was this special type of deer in Canada that would drink human blood. "I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. Were celebrating Canada Day!Knock, knock.Whos there?Ice.Ice who?Ice to meet you, eh?Knock, knock.Whos there?Ottawa.Ottawa who?Ottawa-ter the lawn tomorrow.Knock, knock.Whos there?Yukon.Yukon who?Yukon see the Northern Lights from here!Knock, knock!Whos there?Canada.Canada who?Can Ada come and play please mum?Knock knock.Whos there?Honeydew.Honeydew who?Honeydew you wanna dance?Knock knock.Whos there?Juno.Juno who?Juno how funny this is?Knock knock.Whos there?Boo.Boo who?Awww, dont cry!Knock knock.Whos there?Jimmy.Jimmy who?Jimmy crack corn and I dont care!Knock knock.Whos there?Bologna.Bologna who?Bologna sandwich with mayo and cheese, please.Knock knock.Whos there?Weekend.Weekend who?Weekend do anything we want.Knock knock.Whos there?Watts.Watts who?Watts for dinner? Obviously the answers are not to be taken seriously, but the questions were . 2. It is all mapleleaf! Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? 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